Reflections on school and spirit
by Nan Cardella

School began Jan 4, 2003 with our opening ritual and orientation. As I looked around at all the unfamiliar faces I wondered to myself “Now why did I think this was a good idea?” I had thought of the School of Sacred Ministries years before but had some major changes to take care of in my personal life before I was ready. As I moved through the next three years, I completely forgot about it until a casual reference by a friend brought me to an instant realization that I would be enrolling.

More than a year after beginning, I find myself pondering how to communicate what a profound impact the school has had on my life. It’s hard to put into words the depth of experience that we as a class have created given the wonderful container called “School of Sacred Ministries”. We have laughed and cried together, sat mesmerized by our instructors, made music, prayed, danced, and been beautifully and completely human. At this point when we create a circle at the end of class or at the end of a retreat we seem to lack the initiative to leave. We look around and linger – not wanting to leave the wonderful space we’ve created between us. I distinctly remember a Friday class at one of our retreats. The instructor had finished with his material and we began ad hoc chanting, fishing around for something that felt right. We were unstructured and off-key at first, just trying things out. Then we pulled a coherent chant together and the energy in the room began to rise. By the time we finished you could feel the peace and harmony as if it was a dense mist that has gently moved into the room. We sat quietly soaking up the effect long after the chant had ended. The silence was broken only by a student gently murmuring “sweet magnet” – a heart-felt reference to the fact that no one was in any hurry to leave that room full of bliss.

I could list the various faiths we have had the pleasure to learn about, but the particular belief systems or associated rituals do not capture it. The instructors themselves have blessed us with their heart-felt version of what it’s like to walk their path. Our governing circle has selected teachers (normally not professional instructors) who are shining examples of their faith, willing to speak of their personal journey as well as historical and theological perspectives. For me it’s the heart of the instructors that has kept me riveted throughout the Saturday lecture and discussions. I’ve found myself drawn to so many possible paths in the last year my head is spinning. However, I’m beginning to realize that for me this journey has not been about shopping around for my own religion (or course of study etc.), but getting a taste of the many paths, and learning to deeply value the truths inherent in all. When I heard simple African proverbs from Kofi Opoku, I was brought to tears. So profound yet almost childlike in their simplicity. Mystical Christianity offered me a whole new perspective on the Christian path – opening the door for redefining my faith of origin.

Year two has brought more of an experiential aspect to our training. A retreat focusing on what we believe and how we perceive God. Study of spiritual emergency and how to assist others that are going through this kind of crisis. Death, dying, and grief. The bond that has developed among our class has created a platform to go deep into these topics with a feeling of safety and complete support. I don’t think I’ve ever been as vulnerable in my life as the day we did a non-verbal listening exercise, making only eye contact with our partner and gently opening to allow ourselves to be seen. This was teaching related to counseling and learning how to intensely hold space for another.

When I began this program my intent was to gain skills to be helpful to others and open the door to a new profession focused on this. I had no idea that I would learn so much about myself along the way, or become so close to such a wonderful group of people. The training for me has been far beyond what I anticipated. As I have grown, many ways to apply what I have learned in my current job have opened up. What began as an effort to close the door to my current profession has resulted in opening to an aspect of it I never thought was available. I’m not yet a “Reverend” but for me that does not matter. I feel that I can bring the interfaith message into this world without ever speaking of God or overtly putting myself forward as a Minister. I’m not sure what the future holds but it’s clear to me that my experience in the School of Sacred Ministries was, and is, a treasured part of my life experience.

Note: Reverend Nan Cardella was Ordained in December 2004.